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‘Give love and positive energy to your marriage’

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BY JE’DON HOLLOWAY-TALLEY
Special to the Birmingham Times

“You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them. If you would like to be considered for a future “Hello’’ column, or know someone, please send nominations to Erica Wright ewright@birminghamtimes.com. Include the couple’s name, contact number(s) and what makes their love story unique.

CRYSTAL & RODERIQUES STUBBS

Live: Pinson

Married: August 3, 2013

Met: Crystal and Roderiques met in 2008 at a [former] Southside night club, Banana Joes. Crystal said she was out with a girlfriend, and as they were shooting pool, she remembered Roderiques kept his eye on her but it took some time for him to come over. When he did they had a conversation and she gave him her number.  Crystal said she was very attracted to Roderiques, and recalled thinking “this is one fine chocolate man right here, he’s got a beautiful smile, and his teeth were pearly white,” she laughed.

Roderiques said “she was beyond beautiful, naturally. Her smile…as I watched her throughout the night [he saw] she wasn’t being wild. Basically, I liked how she carried herself,” he said.

First date: The pair saw a movie. Crystal said she was intrigued by their common interest in the intellectual film.“We saw ‘The Great Debaters’ with Denzel Washington . . . we still talk about that movie to this day”

Roderiques said the movie was perfect for their date and opened my eyes to that she was an amazing woman. “Not only is she beautiful, she also has brains,” Roderiques said.  

“After the movie he took me straight home,” she said. “We talked a lot in the car and then walked me to the door, he was a perfect gentleman. It was a great first encounter.”

As well as that first date went, the couple wouldn’t pick back up again until January, 2009.

The turn: Once the pair reconvened in 2009 Crystal would become pregnant.

“We were still in the dating phase when we conceived our son, so throughout the pregnancy and even after the pregnancy we were still getting to know each other, but once he [their son] was here we realized we were a family,” Crystal said. “We were better together.”

“After my son was born, spending time with her and raising our son together showed me that I couldn’t live my life without her,” Roderiques said.

“And, I wouldn’t let us live together until we were getting married…he came and saw his son every single day, but we did not move in together until our son was 3-years-old,” Crystal said.

The proposal: Crystal and Roderiques got engaged in February 2010, at the Hoover Golden Corral.  “I got both of our families and her friends together,” Roderiques said.

Crystal thought they were at the restaurant for dinner.

“I’m a eater, I love a buffet situation,” she said. “He told me we were going to celebrate his twin uncle’s birthday…but when I get there I see all my family and friends, then he got down on one knee and he proposed.”

The wedding: Ranchos Dela Aguilas in Irondale. “We had a huge wedding, twelve bridesmaids and twelve groomsmen. The colors were coral, teal, and silver,” she said.

Most memorable for the bride was “how beautiful everything turned out,” she said. “We didn’t have any hiccups, everything went so smoothly, everything was absolutely perfect,” Crystal said.

Memorable for Roderiques was the moment during the nuptials.

“We were getting ready to pray and my son grabbed me by the leg while me and my wife were holding hands. That was kind of a tear jerker for me, it symbolized our family,” Roderiques said. The couple honeymooned in Cancun, Mexico.

Words of wisdom: Forgiveness is a key factor in keeping marriages together, Roderiques said.

“You have to be able to communicate and you have to be able to forgive during hard times,” he said. “You have choose to your words wisely during communication so that you will be able to forgive when it’s over,” he said.

“Marriage is what you make it,’ he added. “What you put into your marriage is what you’re going to get out of it.”

For Crystal, support and a solid foundation are key.

“You have to be supportive of your mate in anything and everything that they do because that contributes to the happiness of yourself and your significant other,” she said. “You have to be each other’s rock during the hard times, and be open to how each other are feeling, you can’t keep stuff bottled up.”

She added, “give love and positive energy to your marriage because that is what you can get back. Even during the rough times, you can’t think negatively, you have to put in good energy.”

They both agree on patience, and Jesus playing a significant role in the success of their marriage.

Happily ever after: Crystal, 32, is a nurse practitioner at Regenerative Medical Institute and a registered nurse at University of Alabama at Birmingham (UAB) Hospital. She is a Center Point native, and a Ramsay High School grad.

Roderiques, 34, is a Woodlawn native and a Woodlawn High School grad. He is a Fireman at Birmingham Fire and Rescue, and a barber.

The couple love movies, bowling and going out to eat.

The Stubbs are parents to son Jacobie, 8, and daughter Journee, 1.