By Je’Don Holloway-Talley | Special to the Birmingham Times
(Third of Three Parts)
This Valentine’s Day, The Birmingham Times steps into the chambers of justice and the corridors of care to celebrate three extraordinary marriages where love lives at the intersection of duty and devotion. We shine a light on the relationships of three area judges and doctors who are building healthy bonds while serving a community shaped by history, faith, and resilience.
Love rises above all in the lives of Circuit Court Judge Fred Bolling and Brandi Bolling, M.D.; Circuit Court Judge David Hobdy and Cynthia Hobdy, M.D.; and Circuit Court Judge Reginald Jeter and Autumm Jeter, Ph.D.
On the bench, in the clinic, and in courtrooms, boardrooms, and state offices, these men and women are entrusted with the lives, liberties, and well-being of others. Yet at home, they are husbands and wives learning, like every couple, how to extend grace and use wisdom acquired over years of matrimony.
Over the next three days, we will share their love stories. Yesterday, the Bollings; Friday, the Hobdys and today, the Jeters.
CIRCUIT COURT JUDGE REGINALD JETER, & AUTUMM JETER, Ph.D.
Live: Hoover
Married: July 31, 2004
Met: At a Kappa Alpha Psi fraternity party at Miles College in 1998.
“I went to Talladega College, and he went to Samford [University]… My [AKA] sorority sisters and I went, and he and his [Kappa] fraternity brothers were there, and I noticed Reginald was a little quiet and reserved, but he was good looking,” Autumm said. It was a quick introduction, but long enough for Autumm to know she would not mind getting to know him better. “We had literally just met, but he was nice, so I gave him my phone number, and we started talking,” she said.
Reginald was intrigued by Autumm’s lively personality. “She was extremely talkative and outgoing, so that’s what made me want to talk to her,” Reginald remembered.
At the time, Autumm and Reginald were sophomores at their respective schools. “The relationship did not stick at first; we were sophomores in college… We did not become a couple until our senior year,” she said.
Both graduated from college in May 2001, moved back to Birmingham, and began pursuing their postgraduate education. Autumm started teaching and started graduate school at the University of Alabama at Birmingham [UAB] to earn her master’s degree, and Reginald started law school at the University of Alabama’s School of Law [UA]. They married in July 2004, and continued their education at Samford University, where Autumm received a Doctor of Education, and UAB, where Reginald received a Master of Business Administration.
Prioritizing love: For Reginald and Autumm, they recognized early on that prioritizing their love as much as they did their education and budding careers would be crucial. Before getting married, they lived separately and would go days without seeing each other due to their rigorous schedules.
“Early on, I realized that the same effort that I was putting into my education would have to be put into our relationship because we were not seeing each other every day, we had to be intentional,” said Reginald. “So just as I had to set a schedule for classwork and things of that nature, we also had to set time for us to be able to talk, go out to dinner, and spend time.”
“We made sure that we talked often and that we met often. There just was an intentionality about it, just because we both had demanding schedules,” Autumm added.
Asked how they protect their marriage when work never really turns off, Reginald said, “We do not really have a set schedule… so we cannot just leave the work [at the office]. There may be things that occur outside of the normal nine-to-five – [police] officers may have to get me to sign a warrant, or there may be an emergency issue where you have to get a judge to enter a mercy order. “We both realize our jobs are not your normal nine-to-five. So, we just have to be flexible.”
“If there’s something that we have scheduled to do with family, we generally don’t let anything interfere, unless it’s something we just cannot prevent,” Autumm said.
Seeing about each other: To keep the scales balanced, you simply “have to turn it off and just have to be there,” Autumm said. “We’ve been together 25 years, and married for 21, so we know what the other person needs. If Reginald wants to watch a game or a movie, I will do that with him. If I want to go to a concert or watch one of these reality shows, he will watch it with me. Or, currently, we have one in college, we will say, ‘Hey, let’s call our oldest.’ You have to stop the work for some time and see about each other and your family.”
“Your spouse is with you during your worst days and your best days,” Reginald said. “You have to have patience. There are times when you bring cases home with you, and we generally talk about them with each other. The same thing with her, she has things that go on in the school system, and we talk about it and bounce ideas off each other.”
Keeping the spark: Asked how they keep the spark alive, Autumm said it is all in doing special things with and for each other. “We celebrate Valentine’s Day, Christmas, and all of our birthdays, but it is in the special things we do for each other. You have to do the fun things the other person enjoys.”
“You just have to continue dating each other,” Reginald added. “The things that we did when we first got together, we still do. We schedule movie nights… and even after 21 years, we still date each other.”
Lessons learned. Asked what marriage has taught them, Autumm said, “Patience is needed in life and marriage because you merge into one. Careers add new stress, new phases, and new demands, so you have to be patient. Partnership means you are in it together, and purpose is supporting the things each other wants in life and just making it work.”
Reginald added, “You have to have patience. Purpose evolves, and partnership means carrying the other when they need encouragement. All three go together.”
Happily ever after: The Jeters attend The Worship Center Christian Church in Bessemer and have two sons, Jordan, 19, and Joshua, 16.
Autumm, 47, is a Fairfield native and Fairfield Preparatory High School graduate. She attended Talladega College, where she earned a bachelor’s degree in education, the University of Alabama at Birmingham [UAB], where she obtained a master’s degree in education, and Samford University, where she received a Doctor of Education degree. She is a member of Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority Inc. and is the current Assistant State Superintendent with the Alabama State Department of Education.
Reginald, 47, is a Birmingham native and a Ramsay High School graduate. He attended Samford University, where he earned a bachelor’s degree in business administration and management, and the University of Alabama School of Law, where he obtained a Juris Doctor degree, and the University of Alabama at Birmingham [UAB], where he received a Master of Business Administration. Reginald is a member of Kappa Alpha Psi Fraternity Inc. and currently serves as a Circuit Court Judge for Jefferson County.
