BY JE’DON HOLLOWAY-TALLEY | Special to the Birmingham Times
JOYCELYN ‘JOY’ AND CHRIS WHITE
Live: Hoover
Married: Dec. 6, 2014
Met: Spring 2012, at The Plum Bar in downtown Birmingham. Joy was a regular patron and friends with the establishment’s sound tech, who was also friends with Chris. Chris, also a musician who plays bass guitar, was invited by their mutual friend to the bar’s open mic night when he and Joy first crossed paths.
“I was just chilling up there in the sound booth with our friend and Chris was standing in the corner wearing a black batman jacket…,” Joy laughed. “He was smiling at me and then came up to me and asked me if I had the time, and I was thinking ‘don’t you have a watch on?’, but I told him it was 9:30, and he smiled, said ‘thank you’ and walked away.”
The pair did not make a connection that night, but began running into to each other every week at open mic night. Eventually, Joy said she began to let her guard down and started conversing with Chris and realized she liked him.
“I would go up there and sing a little something, and he would go up there and play a little something, and then one night he was already playing when I got on the stage, and he played and sang with me [Anita Baker’s ‘Caught up in The Rapture of Love’] … It was a nice groove, and then after that we [hit it off] because we enjoyed singing together,” recalled Joy.
“Of all the women in the room, Joy stood out to me. I like her style, she was a classy girl, and she could sing and I’m a sucker for women who can sing because I’m a musician,” Chris said. “And when I heard her sing, I was hooked– a beautiful girl who could sing? That was it for me. She was educated and everybody seemed to know her, she was respected, and that sat with me. I really enjoyed being around her.” So much so, Chris told their mutual friend, “that girl is going to be my wife one day.”
Although Chris and Joy made an initial connection, the two did not immediately go on a date. For months, they nurtured a friendship over the phone and weekly meetups at open mic night before Chris asked Joy out for a date.
First date: Fall 2012, at Stix, a Japanese Hibachi restaurant, in Hoover. Chris picked Joy up from her job at Target in Brookwood and they headed out. “I put a little extra effort into my outfit for work that day,” Joy laughed. “I tried to touch up my makeup before I walked out because I wanted to look perfect.”
“I was nervous,” said Chris. “I had never been [to Stix] before and I didn’t eat any Japanese or Chinese food… That wasn’t my vibe, but that was the first step in building trust because I didn’t know what I was getting myself into at this place,” he laughed. “I’m a gentleman, and I followed the old school rules. I made sure I got her home at a decent time and was very respectful.”
“I was nervous at first too because I wanted to make sure I didn’t say or do the wrong things,” Joy said. “…I didn’t even really eat my food because I didn’t want him to think I was greedy,’ she laughed, “and I even practiced the questions I was gonna ask before the date because I wanted the conversation to flow. But all of that went out the window because it became so natural and everything just flowed. The date was so good I didn’t want the night to end.”
The turn: October 2012, when they were leaving the Plum Bar. Joy and Chris were parked in different directions, but talked on the phone on the way to their cars.
“He said he wanted to kiss me tonight, and by this time we were both in our cars, and I asked him why he didn’t do it, and he said ‘how about we do it now?’ So we pulled over into a parking lot and got out and kissed. And after the kiss, I asked him ‘so what are we doing?’” Joy said.
“We sat in that parking lot and we talked for a while, and that conversation led to us becoming exclusive. It was an organic conversation, and I don’t remember all the details, but I know we drove away boyfriend and girlfriend,” Chris said.
The proposal: Dec. 13, 2013, at Olive Garden in Hoover. This was the day after Joy’s 28th birthday, and she recalls being upset with him because he didn’t take her out on her “actual birthday”.
“[On my birthday] he took me to Moe’s [a Tex Mex restaurant] to eat and I was sitting there pissed,” Joy said. “And he said, ‘trust me, you’re going to love what I have planned for you tomorrow’, and I wasn’t hearing that. I wanted to celebrate on my birthday, not tomorrow,” she laughed.
The cause for the delayed celebration was because Chris wanted to reserve a private room to host 50 of their family and friends to celebrate Joy’s birthday and witness the proposal, and the restaurant only had availability for the day after her birthday.
“It was a surprise, but she still thought it was just a birthday dinner, and as the night went on the family was distracting her with opening presents until I was ready. And when I was, I got everybody’s attention and got down on one knee and asked her to marry me,” Chris said.
“He got down on his knee and said in the most country way ‘Joy, I would like to know if you want to be my wife?’” Joy laughed. “He said it so slow and country that everybody laughed, and my sister, still mocks him to this day. But I was caught completely off guard, I did not know he was going to propose. I started crying, and then everybody was like ‘yes or no?’ and I said ‘yes’.”
The wedding: At Grants Chapel AME Church, in East Lake, officiated by Bishop L. Spencer Smith of Impact Church in Tuscaloosa, and Pastor Eric Nathan of Grants Chapel AME Church. Their colors were purple, turquoise and grey.
Most memorable for the bride was the reception at the Boutwell Auditorium in downtown Birmingham. “The theme of our wedding was “The White Tour’, and we had it at the Boutwell because we wanted the reception to feel like it was at a concert hall … We did a full playlist in front of a full band, and singing all the songs we’ve ever played together at the Plum Bar. And the song that touched me the most was when we sang ‘Caught Up In The Rapture of Love’ by Anita Baker because that was the first song we ever did together,” Joy said. “It felt so good because he had my hand, and in that moment it was just me and him doing what we love to do in front of all of our friends and family and everybody could see why our love was what it is.”
Most memorable for the groom was his bride’s delayed walk down the aisle. “When it was time for her to walk down the aisle I felt like it took two days and she was standing me up. All the beginning ceremony stuff was done, and they started playing ‘Here Comes the Bride’, and I’m up there with the pastors and my best man, and we’re just waiting and waiting and waiting, and it was like she never came,” Chris laughed. “She says it was only five minutes, but it wasn’t, and it feels like an hour when you’re standing in front of a church full of people thinking your bride ran away.”
Joy chimed in: “It was only like five or six minutes, I had had a malfunction with my makeup, it was doing something real crazy and I was like ‘uh uh, I can’t go’, and then my dad came in there trying to calm me down, and I didn’t care that they were waiting, I felt like it’s my day, they’ll wait. And when I was ready, I came down.”
“Meanwhile, I’m up there suffering, sweating bullets,” Chris said. “I guess I was just happy she showed up,” he laughed.
They honeymooned in Destin, Florida and said they had fun consummating their marriage over and over again.
Words of wisdom: “Communication is number one. That’s really the answer,” Chris said. “Never go to be angry. Try to fix it in the moment to continue to grow,” said Joy.
Happily ever after: The White’s attend Unity Christian Center, in Alabaster, where they both serve in the music ministry, and have a yorkie terrier, named Bella-Rose, 10-years-old.
Joy, 39, is a Midfield native, and Ensley High School grad. She attended Alabama State University where she earned a bachelor’s degree in theater arts and is a member of Sigma Alpha Iota Music Fraternity for women, and Tau Beta Sigma National Honorary Band Sorority, Joy works as a third & fifth grade teacher at Calvary Resurrection Christian Literacy School in Roebuck, and also owns a home-based business named Jookin and Juicing, an organic health juicing company.
Chris, 38, is a Roebuck native, and Huffman High School grad. He attended Alabama Agricultural & Mechanical University, where he earned a bachelor’s degree in music business, and is a Free Mason [a community-based fraternity] and is a music teacher for Birmingham City Schools.
“You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them. If you would like to be considered for a future “Hello’’ column, or know someone, please send nominations to Barnett Wright bwright@birminghamtimes.com. Include the couple’s name, contact number(s) and what makes their love story unique.
