‘My Thing Was That You Know When You Know … I Had No Doubt About It’
Jo & Charles Chambers
By Mia Watkins | The Birmingham Times
Live: Vestavia Hills
Married: August 10, 1991
Met: Jo and Charles Chambers either met in the 1960s or the 1990s, depending on who you ask.
“He says we met when we were in college.” Jo Chambers said. “I don’t remember meeting him. I remember his roommates, but I don’t remember meeting him. He says he saw me, but I don’t ever remember being introduced.”
Charles Chambers, an Auburn student at the time, was doing a co-op program with BellSouth in the late 60s.
“We met at UAB,” he said. “There was a gathering of UAB students as well as Auburn. This was either in 1968 or 1969. She was dating a Marine. I was dating someone else, too”
Fast forward to 1990, and the two crossed paths again.
“With people from that group, I was living in Tuscaloosa at the time, and he was living in Birmingham,” she said. “I had come up to a party with those friends. We were having breakfast at a restaurant and he walked in. It was the day of the Auburn-Alabama game, and my friend Pat says, ‘Oh, there’s Charles.’ I looked up and I said, ‘Who’s Charles?’ She says, ‘You remember Charles.’ She tried to explain. I didn’t remember him. She was telling me that we were going to get together again at Christmas. But he didn’t come to that gathering. He came to the New Year’s gathering. That’s when we met.
“He came in and he sat down by me, and we started talking,” Jo said. “Everybody moved over to Pat’s house to play cards. We kept talking. We were card partners. You know you get up, come back and play again at some point. We just talked and talked the whole night.”
Charles told Jo he had to take his son on a camping trip, but they exchanged numbers and kissed goodnight. Charles didn’t call her until Sunday.
“He was actually in Centreville at his mom’s, which isn’t far from Tuscaloosa,” Jo remembered. “He had to come over to Tuscaloosa to get a part for his mom’s stove.”
Charles stopped by to see Jo.
“I had rollers in my hair, but he came back.”
First date: The two went to see “Dances with Wolves” on their first date.
“We were just getting to know each other, so we were just kind of feeling each other out,” Jo said.
Their second date was a comedy show with the comedian George Wallace.
“I’d never been married,” Jo said. “I had dated several guys that I thought I would have married but didn’t for whatever reason. So, I said, ‘God, if you want me to have somebody, send somebody because I can’t get this right.’ I had just broken up with a guy in November before we met in December. I said that maybe this is something.”
Charles, who had been married for 18 years previously, wasn’t necessarily looking for a relationship.
“But it felt right,” he said. “The ease of conversation and there didn’t seem to be any pretentiousness on Jo’s part. I felt that this may be the one.”
The two embarked on a relationship, despite living in two different cities.
“We talked almost every night on the phone,” Jo said. “I thought, maybe this is what I’m looking for.”
The turn/proposal: “He knew sooner than I did,” Jo said.
The two were talking one night in March when Charles asked Jo a life-changing question.
“He said, ‘What if I said let’s get married in December?” she said. “You know, I’m going along with this and say, ‘Nobody wants to get married in December. That’s Christmas. I don’t want my wedding anniversary and Christmas on the same day.’ He threw out some other things, ‘What about June?’ I had recently gone back to school to get my second master’s. I was in school at the time at UA. And I said, ‘I’ll be in school in June, we can’t get married in June.’ He threw out something else and asked when would be a good time. I said, ‘Well probably August. I would have finished my classes. That would be before I start student teaching.’ He said OK.”
“When I hung up, I was like, ‘What just happened?” she remembered with a laugh. “Was that a proposal or were we just talking? I thought that we hadn’t known each other that long, is this guy crazy? I just didn’t know what to think about that conversation. I had to ponder that one for a while.”
For Charles, the marriage conversation didn’t come too soon. It was right on time.
“My thing was that you know when you know,” he said. “I had no doubt about it at that time. Again, the ease of conversation and I felt we were on the same wavelength in terms of family responsibilities and all that stuff. That was my way of saying let’s move this along. The other part was just a matter of … I didn’t have time for games. We both were 40 years old, and I wasn’t playing games. It is or it isn’t, you know? Plus, I was concerned about my two sons. It was a matter of let’s move on it.”
The next step was to tell both of their mothers, who they were extremely close with.
“I think how both of us related to our mamas brought us together,” Jo said. “I knew he would be there for me and my mom. He knew that I would be there for him and his mom.”
Jo also had to meet Charles’ mother for the first time. Charles then introduces Jo to his mom and leaves the two to talk.
“I’m just meeting her,” she said. “We’re having a little awkward conversation and she said, ‘Well, you know, I don’t get in my children’s business.’ I said, ‘Yes, ma’am.”
The rest of their family and friends approved of their fast courtship. Charles recalls being on a camping trip and telling his friend that he was contemplating marriage.
“His question to me was how well I knew Jo and if she was the right one,” he said. “I said yes with no hesitation. He was supportive and he was in the wedding.”
When Charles met Jo’s aunt later, she had one question for him.
“She asked if she could see his broom,” Jo recalled. “He said, ‘What broom?’ and she said, “The one you swept her off her feet with.’”
The wedding: The two got married in a simple ceremony at Bailey Tabernacle CME Church in Tuscaloosa.
“I was 40 years old,’ she said. “I didn’t want frills. I bought a tea-length dress. My aunt said I had to wear a veil. I found a headpiece that we added a short veil to. It was cute. I didn’t send out invitations.”
However, Jo’s mother invited everyone in town.
Many of Charles’ relatives also came to the wedding. Her two cousins served as her bridesmaids and his brother and friend served as groomsmen.
Jo wore ivory and pink.
She said that her favorite memory was the 12-year-old who caught the bouquet at the reception.
“Later on, she was my student at the Alabama School of Fine Arts,” she said. “Everybody was asking how that little girl got the bouquet.”
Because the two didn’t get to eat at the reception, they stopped at an Olive Garden when they got back to Birmingham.
“It was a line, and somebody from the inside came out and got us,” she said. “They asked if we just got married, they gave us a table and brought us champagne.”
Charles remembers struggling with volume control during the wedding.
“They said I was saying my vows too loud,” he said.
The honeymoon: The two went to Sea Island, Georgia, for their honeymoon, a popular honeymoon destination for U.S. Presidents.
“He didn’t tell me where we were going, he just said pack stuff for the beach,” Jo said.
That’s when Charles found out that his bride was a soap opera fan.
“The first full day, we were getting ready to go to the beach, I thought,” he recalled with a laugh. “She told me she couldn’t leave because ‘The Young and the Restless’ was on TV. She started telling me about Victor, Paul and all of them.”
Words of wisdom: The two said the secret to a long marriage is respect.
“Listen to each other,” Jo said. “Sometimes, and we have done it, you’re not listening to what the other person is saying. You have to consider their feelings and what they’re going through. The first time Charles told me that I shouldn’t feel like that, I told him, ‘You can’t tell me how to feel.’ Let me get in my feelings and get through it, and he learned. He read the book “Men Are From Mars and Women Are From Venus” and said that it’s so true. We’re not always going to be on the same page, but at some point, we’ve got to get on the same page.”
Charles said it’s about teamwork.
“It’s all about partnership,” he said. “You work together. You respect and recognize that, and it makes a difference.”
Happily ever after: The Chambers are parents to Charles’ two sons, who are 50 and 47. They have six grandchildren and two great-grandchildren.
Jo retired from the Alabama School of Fine Arts (ASFA) and Charles retired from AT&T.
In this phase of life, they love to travel the world. They’ve been to every continent with the exception of Antarctica.
“I’ve learned that I can play golf, she can do her shopping, and everyone is happy,” Charles said.
“You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them. If you would like to be considered for a future “Hello’’ column, or know someone, please send nominations to editor@birminghamtimes.com. Include the couple’s name, contact number(s) and what makes their love story unique.
