By Keisa Sharpe-Jefferson
What’s one of the most beautiful accessories that we can wear that never ages with time?
Over these next few days, take a good look at a person who walks in maturity. I’d arguably say there is an attractiveness there. They don’t live above conflict or challenges they just know how to deal with them head on:
–They aren’t distraught by disagreements.
–They don’t crumble in the face of criticism.
–And they aren’t intimidated by other people’s gifts, talents and ideas.
–They take life in stride.
If I had to give you one glaring sign or symbol of immaturity, it’s the ability to not be able to handle conflict without destroying people or things. You know the image, the person who, in every disagreement, has to raise their voice or actions and “one up” everyone around them.
In the interim, they feel as though they are winning the shouting match. But long-term, the interpersonal and image perceptions of the individual can become skewed.
Who wants to deal with someone who can’t handle a difference of opinion? Few will want that baggage. And I’ll go out on a limb here.
I will certainly heap on our praise, but I’ll tell the truth when it warrants too.
If you’re out of control with your significant other when an issue arises, trust me when I tell you this one thing — there is nothing attractive about a person who can’t keep their cool, especially in an argument.
Am I asking you to take abuse? Absolutely not. You always have the option to remove yourself from any foolishness in whatever form that takes.
Hang up, walk out or move on – whichever best suits the situation when it comes to abuse. But when it comes to matters of differing opinion, we don’t always have to take it there (that escalated and embarrassing level).
I am asking you to think it through, and rise above the fleshly, knee-jerk reactions in order to defend yourselves. And I am asking you to do this in an unapologetic manner.
- They may hurl insults your way, but you can rise above it.
- They may spread false information about you, but your life will disprove it.
- They may find fault even when you’re giving your very best, but trust, your consistency will expose them.
Offenses will come, but how you deal with them tells the full story.
Let’s make this our year to rise above and stop allowing others to push our buttons (and everything else). Sometimes we must realize it’s best to walk away. We don’t have to accept every argument we’re invited into.
I believe in you and I’m cheering for you.
Contact me and let’s talk through your success plan!
Keisa Sharpe-Jefferson is a life coach, author and speaker. Her column appears each month online and in The Birmingham Times. You can contact Keisa at firstname.lastname@example.org and visit http://www.allsheanaturals.com for natural hair and body products.