BY JE’DON HOLLOWAY-TALLEY | Special to the Birmingham Times
JERMELL & ENEKA IRVING
Live: Pleasant Grove
Married: July 25, 2020
Met: October 2016, at Jermell’s home church, Shiloh Missionary Baptist Church in Brighton. Jermell was there serving for the church’s youth day, and Eneka was invited by their mutual friend, and Jermell’s fellow church member, Bernita.
“When she came across [the food] line my eyes lit up, and I gave her an extra piece of chicken,” Jermell laughed.
“I was just in my own little world getting my food, I didn’t think nothing of it,” Eneka laughed. “I just smiled back, and said ‘thank you, nice to meet you.’”
A few weeks later, Jermell reached out to Bernita “and asked if Eneka was single and if it would be okay to get her number,” Jermell recalled.
When Bernita let Eneka know of Jermell’s interest initially she thought he was talking about this other guy and said, “no thank you, he’s an old man, and he’s married anyway,” Eneka laughed, “and she said, ‘no, not that guy. This one is divorced and he’s young, he’s our age.’ She told me about Jermell, and I told her she could give him my number.”
Jermell called and the two began chatting and set up their first date.
First date: October 2016, at Applebee’s in Bessemer. The pair met up at the restaurant and Jermell showed up bearing a dozen pink roses.
“He got points for that because it told me he was listening during our phone calls,” Eneka said.
“We sat in a booth in a corner, and we talked for hours just getting to know each other, and after the date ended we took a picture outside of Applebee’s together,” Jermell recalled.
The turn: Nov. 6, 2016, at Jermell’s parents’ home in Fairfield. Eneka stopped by for a visit, and Jermell took the opportunity to gauge how Eneka felt about a future together.
“Our second date really showed me she was different. The bill came, and she reached for it first and said, ‘I got it.’ And I was like ‘what?’ I was shocked. That showed me she wasn’t selfish and didn’t mind helping out or treating a person that she cares about … So when she stopped by my folks house that night, we were outside talking and I told her that I wanted us to be in a relationship,” Jermell said.
“I was thinking along the same lines because he was showing me something different too, so I was like ‘yeah, let’s try it.’ But I did ask him if he was sure he wanted to take it that far this fast … and I didn’t say no because I was really interested in him and he was completely different from what I was used to,” Eneka said. “[It was] the conversations we were having, his attentiveness to me, and [the desire] to grow together in a relationship.”
The proposal: November 2018, at Eneka’s parent’s home in Midfield, during the Iron Bowl between Alabama and Auburn. Jermell had previously asked her father for her hand in marriage when they attended the Auburn vs. Alabama State football game, prior to the Iron Bowl.
“Her dad was in on it. The [gathering] was also a birthday celebration for Eneka because her birthday was a few days later… and during halftime, her dad stood up and started giving a speech or like a birthday tribute to Eneka, and he had her back turned to me so that I could get down on one knee. After he finished his speech, he was like ‘alright, it’s [Jermell’s] turn’, and when Eneka turned around to face me, I was down on one knee and she started crying and jumping up and down,” Jermell said. “I cut right to the point, I asked her if she would marry me and she said ‘yes’.”
“I was honestly thinking it was just [a gathering] for the Iron Bowl game. Most of my family was there, but it was the same thing we did [the previous] year. But my brother, Rodrick, was acting [suspicious]. He kept walking around calling out the quarters, and then at halftime, he said, ‘OK, its go time’, and my dad stood up and said, ‘let’s all give a speech to Eneka,’ and he went first, and then when I turned around and saw Mell down on his knee, I started crying because I was shocked and excited. I was extremely happy. I was expecting him to propose soon, but I wasn’t expecting it that night,” Eneka said.
The wedding: At Victory Missionary Baptist Church, in Birmingham, officiated by Pastor Albert Bry Jr. Their colors were peach, mint green and gold.
Most memorable for the bride was when she first entered the sanctuary. “…I saw Jermell and his eyes lit up, I saw pure happiness in his eyes, and I could tell that he thought I looked really beautiful,” Eneka said. “It was just so nice to see [that expression] in his face. And someone also caught a picture of me when I first started walking down the aisle and my eyes were lit up too. My face matched his face, and I remember thinking, ‘ain’t no going back girl, this is it,” she laughed.
Most memorable for the groom was surprising his bride with his vows. “I had told her that I wasn’t gonna write any vows, I was just going to say the traditional ones. And the night before at the rehearsal dinner, I sat at a table and wrote my vows to her and told the pastor I’d be saying my own. So when it came time to say our vows, the pastor passed me the mic, and her face lit up. I had memorized them the night before so that I could say them with passion and let her know that I meant every word I said,” said Jermell. “She had a little tear in her eyes because she didn’t think that I was going to do that.”
Eneka begs to differ. “I did not cry, I laughed. It was funny because we had a full on debate about writing our own vows and he kept saying ‘no, I’m not doing it’. So to get to that day, and he actually did it was funny to me,” she explained.
Jermell clarified that he was never against writing his vows to Eneka, he just wanted to surprise her at the altar.
The couple honeymooned in Las Vegas the following year, due to getting married during the COVID-19 pandemic. “We had fun touring Vegas, sightseeing, and being together,” Jermell said.
Words of wisdom: “Keep God first, always communicate, and be willing to sacrifice. Sometimes you might not want to sacrifice, but you never know how much that sacrifice could mean to your spouse,” Jermell said.
“Always pray together, put God first, and your husband second under God. And don’t let anyone come between your marriage. Always communicate, date each other and be a listening ear and shoulder to lean on,” Eneka said.
Happily ever after: The Irving’s attend New Jerusalem Missionary Baptist Church in Bessemer, where Eneka serves as the praise dance teacher, and Jermell, as an usher. They are godparents of Chosen Walker, 3.
Eneka, 41, is a Midfield native, and Midfield High School grad. She attended Lawson State Community College where she studied business administration and works as a quality technician at Steris in Birmingham. Eneka is currently advocating for greater awareness for women battling with endometriosis.
Jermell, 42, is a Bessemer native, and Jess Lanier High School grad. He attended Miles College where he studied business administration, and Lawson State Community College, where he earned a degree in applied science in business administration and management. Jermell works for Canteen Vending, in Bessemer as a delivery merchandiser.
“You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them. If you would like to be considered for a future “Hello’’ column, or know someone, please send nominations to Barnett Wright bwright@birminghamtimes.com. Include the couple’s name, contact number(s) and what makes their love story unique.
